The Long ride Home

We met with a substitute hospice nurse today. She was very clear with her observations: blue feet, ice cold hands, minimal eating and drinking. Rich is more in a dream like state than with us. This nurse felt we are really beginning the final run on life. She is getting all liquid meds for Rich as he can not swallow pills. He is very sensitive to touch and sounds. 

I spent a few extra minutes kissing him for all the family, friends and our church family. Will keep you posted. Our love to all of you........

The Recliner

When it's all said and done one of the most important things to Rich is comfort. Alas, I have surrendered to the recliner. Rich is very weak now, his standing tolerance for transfers is maybe 10 seconds so we are working out of the recliner. Peggy dropped by a large hunk of memory foam so we will make this his 'bed'. I am trying to remember to shift him from side to side every two hours. He is very happy in this chair. He shaved tonight and it made a big difference in his appearance. Tomorrow he will see Pastor Earl, Mona and Diana. A good day.

The days are so simple. We have visitors from time to time. Loretta and Charmaine have offered to sit with Rich while I work. I appreciate them so much for this kindness. 

Suz was blessed to receive free housing this semester from some parents of one of her classmates. God has been looking out for us in small and big ways. I am glad she will have a mom and dad be with her this next few months. It's a big comfort to us.

Time for bed......

A day of foot ball and The Pink Panther

What a beauty of a day! We had a lovely day with Andrew watching tv and eating pizza. Rich is very alert but in such a weaken state. I was keeping the w/c in the car but am going to put it in the house to ferry between family room and bedroom. Rich eats very little, drinks very little but has wide eyes.....very aware of whats being said and done. 

Church was very sweet last night. Rich stayed home while I zipped up the hill. This church has been so faithful to pray for us...as you have...so it's very special to visit them. They are very tender and kind. We seem to be surrounded by that wherever we go. It's wonderful. Peggy and Sam dropped in after church today and Rich was very happy to see them. There is nothing like an old friend. Peggy and I have been friends for 49.5 years. Wow. She lives closer to me now than when we were kids in Lilly. ONLY God does cool stuff like that. They have always been there for us....so sweet.

New Beginnings

As we start this new year, we are hoping for true direction from the Lord for all of us. New beginnings for all areas. Rich and I have some areas we want to explore this year. Suz left today and it was so hard to watch her go yet....she had to go. Rich and I both want her to finish this semester and get that degree. Andrew continues to be steady at his job and thinking about grad school at some point and time. The Lord has so much for us.....we are only given so many days.

We met with the hospice nurse, Val, today. She had some good ideas on how to keep Rich more alert during the day. He needs to Skype with family and friends tomorrow. We have decided to make 'no plans' on weekends. Hang loose. I will start back with the kale/spinach smoothies tomorrow. Our little garden looks great and it's time to get back to basics. 

Rich is starting to perk up a bit from his surgery. So wonderful to see him smile.

The first home 'aspira' drain

 Suz did the honors today as I worked this afternoon. It was pretty simple and easy on Rich. She drained 2.5 L out of his stomach and so now Rich is snoozing comfortably. His best energy is in the morning so all 'hard' activities need to be done then.  Suz is packed. I am so happy for her. At 22 she has the world by the tail. I am sure we will Skype daily. Promise.

For those of you who have tried to Skype with Rich yet were unable, do continue to try. He is very alert at 8-10 am our time. We will try to connect with some friends this weekend. I did speak to Grandma Stercho today. She is very sad and there is not much to say to her except God can do anything He wants to do. Rich is comfortable and happy to be at home. Hopefully he can Skype with her soon.

Thank you so much for your daily prayers. We continue to live in a peace that's hard to describe. God doesn't promise us tomorrow, nor today. I am rejoicing that we have today. It was a beautiful day.....not too hot nor cold. The sun shown brightly and the birds sang. Life is so beautiful. 

Good night blessed family and friends.

Aspira tube is in...........yeah

Yesterday we had a new drainage tube installed at Queens. It was fast and fabulous. We need to watch the DVD so we can do this ourselves and the procedure is pretty straight forward. Rich is pretty sleepy and sore in his abdomen but when he is alert, it's amazing. He is very cognizant. 

Sunday night we did a special Thanksgiving dinner with our kiddo's and Suzanne. It was wonderful. We all felt so cheated by not having Rich here at Thanksgiving so this meal was extra special. Suz bought all 'organic' foods so we ate well. Rich's appetite is improving so he ate turkey, mashed potatoes, dinner rolls (my oatmeal ones). Suz made some good gravy and that was so delicious. 

We need to move with mini rehab at home. I got the yellow band out and will start with simple stretching. We are doing nice drives on the weekends. Didn't see any whales yet but will keep looking!

Sunday we went to a very special church service. We got to hear Marilyn Hickey speak and minister. It was so encouraging. This woman is 81 yet looks 45. She ministers 'health' in the Lord. We prayed as a group. Charmaine was with us so Rich was flanked in prayer. Cool. For you old timers, Marilyn Hickey has an international healing ministry for over 40 yrs. She ministers mostly in Muslim countries....they don't perceive her as a threat. She has lead many Muslims to Christ. Good to be an older woman. Her message was simple. God loves to use your weaknesses. Yep, that's us.

Wisdom

I am packing up and getting ready to head back to Colorado. It was a really hard decision to make, but all in all felt like the right thing to do. Mostly, my Dad has verbalized it would bring him the most peace to see me continue on that path.

I also can't get a concept I learned in Africa out of my mind: grieving is a first world privilege. Most other places on earth, when someone gets sick and doesn't get better, you either move on or die along with them.

There is nothing wrong with grief or sadness, I have been so appreciative for the rest I have gotten being back home with my family. But I think that concept kind of stuck in my soul. My gut reaction to this is to keep living, keep moving.

Although I have gotten so much advice from folks with the best intentions about what to do next, ultimately I needed to do what was best for my family and I. So thats it, thats my plan. I have peace.

Although I will miss this goof and his words of wisdom.

I sat down with him and asked him my big important questions for life. Here are his answers. They are the best. Like him.

Raising children: Tell your girls they are beautiful (I weep for fifteen minutes, we move on), let your boys be a little reckless and silly. Love them like crazy and give them boundaries and keep to them. Pick them up and hold them when they are babies. Thats how they learn they are loved and can trust you. They are babies, baby them. Affirm them. They are smart and good-looking and kind and you love them. Tell them that all the time. 

Marriage: Marry somebody who loves Jesus fo real (He said THAT. He texts that sometimes and it is the most hilarious). And who leads you towards him. Oh and for you, specifically Suz, someone who lets you be free. You're like your Mother. 

Life: Just follow Christ. Its the best advice I can give. 

And that is that. Go Dad. 

Along with praying for emotional, financial things for our family, prayers for a place for me to live this coming semester are welcome. I am couch surfing with the kindest of friends till then. 

Cheers,

Suz